Seven Mile Itch

So basically running is not like sex or riding a bike or whatever analogy that is...David was gone all week and I was not able to run at all. Just a few miles on the treadmill...which if you read my post a week or so ago-you know how I feel about the treadmill. Oh...and I attempted to go after dropping the kids off at school-so say 9:30 ish. I was like a vampire going to meet the sun. Literally burning alive. I am guessing people in SoFla only run between the hours of 11pm -7am. Kind of like highway construction hours. It was just too damn hot so I had to do the unthinkable...walk. Long story short, I can not just not run and then pick up and run great. Maybe real athlestes can but fat Jewish girls who live in the suburbs can't.

I am not gonna harp on that though. So, luckily, or unluckily, I had Saturday off b/c of Rosh Hashana. However, as we celebrated Saturday night...I couldn't help but think the two pound matzoh ball coupled with the gut-sticking brisket was not going to make for a stellar combo Sunday morning for the six mile run. It started off okay but by about mile three, I seemed to have been given a "babysitter." Yeah-the coaches are super nice and basically they are super humans who can basically run probably 100 miles a day, stop and get gas, and go another 100. They are crazy...and they don't even sweat. I am just dragging, wheezing, laden down with matzoh balls when my nice kind coach comes and helps me out. Keeps me company and keeps me from thinking about all I am thinking about which is basically this: "I wanna die, I am so f-ing hot and tired, is it too much to ask one of the other runners to carry me on their back for the remainder..." You get the idea. But, it really did help and I am happy to say I did complete all six miles running...well, when I say running imagine running with a walker but add tennis balls on a newly waxed floor walker-that pace of running. This Saturday is seven miles...am getting up at 5am tmw to run so I am ready for Saturday. It is 8:00 now so a bit past my bedtime:)

On another note, I have also decided, much to my chagrin, that I am actually immune to diet and exercise. Completely immune. I run, I elliptical, I do weights...all for naught. I watch what I eat-for fucks sake I am eating spinach and wheat germ...and what do I have to show for it??? Nothing. So-if anyone out there reading this knows anything about the condition about being immune to healthy habits, let me know, And if anyone dares say that I need to step up my workouts, I will step it up with a foot in your ass. Basically, in one week I am running like the distance from here to Delray and back PLUS weights PLUS that stupid ass elliptical machine for ONE hour at level 11. I am not giving up though...in the spirit of every female celebrity caught in an unflattering pose, I will say that I love my womanly body no matter what and do not need to conform to any unnatural standards. And then like Jennifer Love Hewitt and K-Hole Kardashian, I will proceed to lose 25 pounds to demonstrate this love for my body. This will fool my body into doing what I will it. A big game of na-na-na-naaa-naa.

Wish me luck for seven miles on Saturday-I am nauseous thinking about it. Hmmm...maybe that is a good appetite suppressant.

Help a girl out and donate at:

http://pages.teamintraining.org/sfl/wdw10/ksingerxn7

You know you want to....:)